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August 31, 2017

Recently I had an experience that shook me to my core. Hands shaking, heart racing, mind freaking out. I lost all my senses in that moment. I couldn't see anything, nor hear the person that started talking to me. Everything faded into the background as my mind scrambled for understanding of what was just presented to me and for answers for what to do next. I left the group I was sitting with and went to the toilets where I messaged my friend with what had just happened. I was so upset I had to leave the event asap and for the next hour my friend and I shared our opinions, our anger and thoughts and possible next moves with each other. Although we came out with no clear answers, being able to share my frustration and hurt with another helped me immensely. Enough so that I could go home and sleep easy. This is massive because the invasion of thoughts would have once prevented me from any slumber.

The next morning I woke up and had an epiphany. For some reason they are flowing to me nearly...

August 28, 2017

I was lucky to get some green therapy this weekend.

Climbing to the Hakarimata Summit is challenging but the mental clarity I gain is worth it.

However a year ago I was climbing to the summit 10 minutes faster. A year ago I weighed less than I am now and was about to run a half marathon.

NOW once upon a time these facts would have set my mind into a series of unkind and self-defeating conversations. But this is not where I went this weekend. Instead I said "It's ok Bex. Just be better than you used to be." BUT hang on!!! This is not the case if I look at these facts. Physically and fitness wise I used to be better. So what does this mean for me??? 

ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!

If I tell you I have lost weight and gained some.

If I tell you I found love and then experienced heartbreak.

If I tell you I secured some clients and lost some clients.

What do both you and I do with this information? What judgements do I create? What judgements do you create?

For me? I choose. I choose truth. The truth I decide...

August 25, 2017

Two years ago this week my world changed.

In a moment my life fell to pieces. I remember it all like it was yesterday. One minute I was a part of a tight family unit and the next my husband and partner for 18 years was moving out. He no longer loved me he claimed. I was devastated. I shared this story publicly the other night at a coaching event. I decided it was time to show people that nothing is certain in life and even as a coach my world can crumble too. I was a mess for weeks even though not many people saw this. I had to be brave for my three children who had just had their lives turn upside down. I remember clearly lying on the bedroom floor broken. Feeling completely and utterly unlovable and undesirable and my life had suddenly become unrecognizable to the one I had been living for so many years. I made this mean my life was unlivable. How could I go on? What was the point?

 Thankfully I had my coaching tools deep within me and a little voice spoke up inside me and said, "Reach...

August 16, 2017

Let's face it sometimes life just doesn't work out how we had hoped and sometimes life doesn't work out as we hoped many times in a row and sometimes it feels like life NEVER EVER works out. I know that I have felt this way many times. Certainly not as much as I used to and it is so much easier to snap out of it. But there have been times when I have wanted to set up my own pity party and hang out there for as long as possible. The strange thing is that nobody else wants to hang out there with me and join in the amazing fun of feeling sorry for myself. In fact I think people are actually repelled by these types of events held by others. We have the expectation that people will flock to our sides and dwell on our issues with us but the don't. And if they do it is oh so temporary before they go back to living their amazing lives.

The world does not stop turning and we should not expect it to because we have a crisis. The fact that the world is always moving is a massive hint that we shoul...

June 27, 2017

Everyday something goes our way!

Everyday something goes well for us!

Everyday we experience good stuff!

You might be thinking that nothing ever goes your way and nothing ever turns out right. Everyone who is in this mindset will be fantastic at finding things in their life to add to their 'My Life Sux' file. I too have had days and weeks like this. And yes fair enough sometimes you have every right to feel low and not enthusiastic about your life and feeling sorry for yourselves. But at some point you have to realize that you need to rescue yourself from this mindset. Staying there is never going to bring you some wins and good stuff!

Start making this your purpose to look for these moments in your life! I guarantee there will be some if not plenty! I am not talking about huge celebrations like winning a dream job or a 50th wedding anniversary or a prestigious award etc. I am talking about small things like a good nights sleep, getting to your appointment on time, a friendly smi...

June 22, 2017

I used this statement this week with a group of young women in which one of them was very concerned about what everybody thought of her. This is not unusual. This is very normal (not natural) and very real for many of us everyday of our lives. We do all sorts of things to ensure we are liked by those around us. Even crazy stuff! We bend and break our personalities and even our bodies to meet what we think somebody wants to see in us. We give away our energy, our love, our friendship, our material things, our time, our integrity and sometimes even our bodies to win someone else over. The thought of another human not liking us or backstabbing us almost destroys us and riddles us with stress and worry. So why do we need to achieve this absolutely unrealistic expectation? Why do we expect to go through life and have everyone like us? We can be the most fabulous person on earth and still get haters.

So back to the group...the look on this women's face as I said...

June 13, 2017

Getting present improves your life dramatically!

It is the most simple, easiest and cheapest way to access happiness now. How normal it is for us to slip into negative thinking and seeing everything that is going wrong and noticing all the people who don't like us as much as we would like or what we should be doing better. If I started a list of what is in my crap file for my life we would be here a while and you would get mighty bored with me quickly. Shit happens a lot maybe even daily and it happens to all of us in different ways in various forms. Some of us deal with it well and some not well and some don't deal with it at all. When the crap comes flying at me if I am present in my body I can really feel the stirring of the stress and the tightening of my gut and the ill feeling taking over. I then imagine what disease I am creating inside my body as this happens and this is enough for me to snap out of it. I take back the power and the control, breathe well and focus on something b...

June 8, 2017

Finding courage within ourselves is quite a hard thing to do. I often ask my children to be brave in situations where they feel outside their comfort zone. And this got me wondering how much they actually see me as their mama being brave. So I put on my brave girl undies and did something that actually makes me feel so uncomfortable and so nauseous this week.

I am a hot yoga addict. And their are lots of hot and fit bodies at yoga. My belly and I are not one of them. We work hard out and I see strength developing everywhere in my body but my puku. My instructors advised me to wear a crop top so that I completely focus on my abdominals during class. The room is surrounded with mirrors so there is no avoiding your reflection. I was horrified by their advice. I would do anything except expose my gut! Some women would not be bothered by this but this has been a sensitive area for me for years! The travelling yoga instructor told me she wanted to see me do this before she moved on to her nex...

May 6, 2017

From the comfort of my cozy bed on a cool autumn morning I can see a magnificent tree out through my window. Each morning I wake up and pull back the curtain to gaze at this majestic creature that nature has produced. Today I noticed that the leaves are starting to fall. Only a couple at a time. it is just the beginning of this tree's journey of letting go. As I watch I breathe deeply and start thinking of things I can let go too. So many things come to mind...excuses, comments, habits, false notions, complaints, accusations, old stories, beliefs, doubts, uncertainty, limitations, fears, negativity, unwillingness, unworthiness, validation, failures, self-hate, destruction, obligations, despair, sadness, depression, anxiety, illusions, rejections, exclusions and judgements. So much to let go of that it is lucky a gust of wind caught the tree and many leaves fall to the ground to keep up with my endless list. Some of these things are more present than others and some barely come up at al...

February 7, 2017

So last year I lost my way a wee bit with my work that I chose. I fell off course and got lost in a job that was not serving me but sucking the life out of me. Yes I choose this and I choose to give my all to this job but most importantly I also CHOOSE to STOP. To give it away and come back to my correct path. How did I know I was off course? I lost my self-care routine almost immediately. I could say I did not have time or energy but if I take complete responsibility here I allowed this to happen. I soon felt the impact emotionally. physically, mentally and spiritually. I gained weight, lost muscle, had little energy and motivation. The day after I finished my job I choose better.

I have worked out almost every day since. My body is getting stronger again and I love it. I can not afford to not exercise. It is that simple. Exercise is not negotiable for this body of mine. I have a body with a lot of muscle when I am fit so as soon as I don't exercise it turns to fat and my metabolism sl...

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Rebecca Kingston

Life  Coach

Mob: 021 163 1084

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© 2019. Rebecca Kingston.

 

Hamilton

New Zealand

breathingspacecoach@gmail.com